Whatever floats your waterlogged goat.
Used instead of whatever floats your boat, whatever floats your goat, and whatever floats your waterlogged boat". A goat totally can't float, because it's waterlogged. See?
Joe: I'm gonna do an internet!
Pete: Whatever floats your waterlogged goat...
Joe: What the actual fuck?
Pete: Whatever floats your waterlogged goat...
Joe: What the actual fuck?