WOOLLETT-ITIS
A mutated and incurable genetic version of narcissistic personality disorder that leads to the sufferer experiencing severe auditory and visual hallucinations. These may include believing you're not a complete fuck stick, ignoring world record equalling staff turnover, using the phrase "blacker than Ernie Dingo," massively exaggerating ones achievements, and being blind to the fact that everyone laughed when you had a heart attack. Ironically, sufferers of Woollett-itis tend to create deep emotional bonds between people around them, who flock together in fierce agreement over their common shock and dismay over the sufferers behaviour.
Haha, that cunt with the Woollett-itis just slipped on some chain awl whilst abusing a staff member for no reason and his heart exploded and his stupid face got caved in. Let's go the pub immediately and have eleventy beers, but first let's all piss on the cunt and fart in his mouth..