Work Apnea

(n): A condition that plagues the majority of people who have to work for a living. Symptoms include: staring profusely at nothing, forgetting to breathe, slow responding vision, and complete lethargy. Cures for this condition include: Vacation, Holidays, Fake Sick Days, Closing time, Weekends, and Jack Daniels. This condition is highly contagious and is usually spread during lunch meetings.