face bludgeon

The act of bludgeoning someone in the face, with a large mallet or stick. The bludgeoning implement is of little importance, so long as it is large and hefty. Do not question the definition and usage of hefty. If you do, you are ignorant. It is the ultimate act of degradation. If one is face bludgeoned, and they survive the bludgeoning, they must immediately kill themselves, unless it is possible for them to redeem themselves by return face-bludgeoning the face bludgeoner.

Louisville slugger face naturally, or someone you want to bash with a blunt object.