Bogan

Australian term for Redneck.

A fascinating beast. The majority of the species are hideously repugnant and unintelligent, and yet they manage to breed in ever-increasing numbers and populate an area known as the outer west. It is quite common to find five or six offspring in each family group, often with a different father for each new baby.
Their habitat consists of a weatherboard or brick-veneer dwelling and is characterised by an early-model Holden or Ford in the driveway surrounded by a group of males discussing why the carby is stuffed and the results of last night's footy (a primitive gladiator-like spectator sport enjoyed by most bogans).
The female of the species, while smaller in stature, is far more loud and aggressive than the male. While the males tend to be very friendly and congregate with other males, the females spend most of their time in supermarkets and shopping malls, using a shrill high-pitched call to discipline their children and contact other females.
Males and females rarely interact socially except during breeding season, which is otherwise known as Friday night. During this time, females are allowed to enter the male-dominated area known as "the pub" and display their impressive coloured plumage to a prospective mate.
Herein lies an intersting phenomenon. Males will often fight over a particularly attractive female and she will mate with only one male, while some less attractive females have been known to have several partners simultaneously.

Ahhhh. The wonders of nature.

To get piss drunk and raise your voice level with each beer thereafter.

ejaculate prematurely before putting a condom on.

A type of Australian that is stereotyped as bogan can usually be defined as trailer park trash and other low life names like Leigh, they can usually be found on street corners with a large group of people wearing jean shorts and thongs holding a stubby of vb.

A term used to describe a normally civilized person. These infected with boganitis may find themselves using trends that bogans use. Such examples include:

1. Enhanced swear word vocabulary.
2. Develops a fondness for canned alcohol/beer.
3. Doesn't see the point in shaving anymore.
4. Will wear singlets (typically blue or white) to any occaison.

Lowest class, usually concentrated in poorer suburban areas of Australia. 'Thick-heads', yet super infated egos, bogans have very limited vocabulary, yet can be seen scorning others that use language or social skills that the bogan does not possess. Also, any extended period of non-comprehension, will lead to branding as UN-AUSTRALIAN (The bogan with super-inflated ego naturally sees themselves as the quintessential Australian.)

The bogan interprets others avoiding them (because of their "general unpleasantness") as fear of the bogans imagined POWER and MASCULINITY.

Their understanding of the world comes from the images imprinted on their visual cortex.

Do not put a bogan in a position where an opinion of philosopy, arts, literature etc. is called for.

Leave quiety and swiftly if you encounter the bogan, and if pressed, speak in the third person about cars that radiate "Bogan-ness". Utes are "working-class" and therefore to the bogan "higher-class".

{ situational construct }
A bogan if blindfolded and released in the centre of Beverly Hills, would stand aghast, and all of the amalgam of conflicting ideals inside the bogan mind, would cause instantaneous implosion, possibly creating relativistic space-time distortion, thus compicating things further.

If cornered further by "the bogan" which mistakes you for a friend:

--talk sex, drinking bourbon etc.--
Again in the third person, omniscient.
Observation, pointing, and commenting is best.

Leave A.S.A.P.,