ablesplaining
Ablesplaining is a patronizing "explanation" of any aspect of disability from someone who does not have the lived experience of being disabled. An ablesplainer's opinion is often shared without request and with a grossly inflated sense of entitlement. Don't be an ablesplainer.
Stop defending your words. You are ablesplaining!
i.e.
"I can use words like stupid, retard, moron, and idiot because they are just language and aren't meant to offend anyone."
"But you don't look like you have a disability!"
"Look at that person parking in an accessible parking space! They don't need a wheelchair so they are just taking advantage of the system."
"That child doesn't look autistic to me, the parents just need to discipline him/her."
"We are in compliance with ADA because we have wheelchair ramps and accessible bathroom stalls."
i.e.
"I can use words like stupid, retard, moron, and idiot because they are just language and aren't meant to offend anyone."
"But you don't look like you have a disability!"
"Look at that person parking in an accessible parking space! They don't need a wheelchair so they are just taking advantage of the system."
"That child doesn't look autistic to me, the parents just need to discipline him/her."
"We are in compliance with ADA because we have wheelchair ramps and accessible bathroom stalls."