Bubbing a Schmear
Using your underwear to clean yourself up after sharting
Why were you behind that dumpster?
Oh I was Bubbing a Schmear after botching a routine fart.
or
I had to Bub a Schmear after sneezing in a hot car.
Oh I was Bubbing a Schmear after botching a routine fart.
or
I had to Bub a Schmear after sneezing in a hot car.