Bundaberg

·Home of Bundy Rum.

·Also a shit boring place to live in. The whole 'Bundy Rum' aspect may be enough to draw in tourists but after they're done taking a tour of how the drink is made I highly doubt they'll find anything else constructive to do. That's if they're still alive.

·Kind of like a combination of the worst parts of a country town and a miniaturized big city.

·Surrounded by towns full of hicks/bogans/yobos for about 350 km in every direction.

·Has it's very own resident hobo, known to pretty much the entire town. He may as well be a celebrity due to the amount of people who know him.

·About half of the male population aged 17-35 enjoys hooning around at night (and day) yelling profanities and insults at anybody who's NOT wearing cut-offs, queer looking sunglasses, sandals, and a gay coloured singlet. Hot girls are also immune from this bullshit. Although they may be subjected to horn honking, wolfwhistles and 'Hey baby!' or 'Nice legs!'.

·If you're not 14-30 and look like you're in a local Hardcore/metal band I'd strongly advise staying off the streets at night. Someone who doesn't fit that description is beat into a coma or something otherwise newsworthy at least once a week. Definitely not a safe place for backpackers (a few years ago a backpacker was pushed off a bridge just for her handbag). Unless of course it's backpackers in numbers. In which case it's not a safe place for anybody at night.

1. To get shafted beyond reason due to no fault of your own. 2. To become the victim of bad luck or bad circumstance 3. To experience luck of the type that resembles the popular Bundaberg Rum which actually tastes foul compared to real rums from The Caribbean.

Bundaberg is a city in Queensland, Australia. It is probably one of the most boring places you could ever dream of living.

There is nothing to do here.

Everyone who is anyone or is even remotely interesting leaves.

Those who actually like it here defend it viciously and you are likely to get punched if you speak ill of their backward town.
To live in Bundaberg and enjoy it, you will need to fit into one of Bundaberg's popular sub-cultures - you may choose from this list:

Over the age of 80
Feral
Bogan
A redneck
Ultra conservative and closed-minded

You get bonus points for being all these things.

Bundaberg is full of ferals and violent bogans who like to steal things, break into houses and drive souped up crap box cars around town while spending their government benefit money on Jim Beam and cigarettes.

Bundaberg is a big enough town to progress, but nothing here ever changes. Ever.

Bundaberg people don't like change or excitement, so you could pretty much go away and come back and in 20 years it would not have changed.

Don't move to Bundaberg unless you want to be unemployed, miserable, constantly bored and stop wearing shoes in public.

Possibly the worst place for a young person to grow up shit boring with the lowest employment rate and one of the highest crime rates.

If your game enough to face the bundy thugs and fuckwits Entertainment in the town is limited the locals usually just bum around outside maccas or hungry tum for a large majority of friday and saturday night either looking for a fight or looking for a chance of picking up a little try-hard 12 year old having a darb outsife.

Centrelink sponsers almost all of the populating emo fuckups, hoons, sluts and celebrity drug dealers.

An old sugar town that responds to change slowly and it may take twenty years to become a local. The old families of the town are respectful, proud and caring people who don't like the path that the town has taken over the past ten years.

Teenagers congregate on the gutters of the streets because there aren't many things on offer for them in this town. The attitude towards learning is quite negative in the public schools - academic achievement is a low priority, while sport, parties, teen pregnancy and cyber slander are the mainstream. Bundaberg has potential, but the growing feral population is a concern for the future of this town.

Cheap discount stores do well in this town, as do government employees. Without the medical, police, primary industries, education, centrelink and main roads staff, this town would shrivel up.

HOME OF THE BUNDY RUM!

A brand of Rum named after Queensland's suger cane town of 'Bundaberg'. Established by sugar millers and given the polar bear logo because they believed the polar bear wards off the coldest chill. Known around Australia as Bundy (and the bear's name is Bundy Bear).