cabbage soup diet
What fat people go on to lose weight. Apparently, if all you eat is cabbage soup, the weight falls off you, but it makes your shit 20 times more rancid. My ex-boss was on one for a couple of months - he'd go grab the newspaper and charge into the toilet for a good half hour session. The place was off-limits for a good 45 minutes afterwards and some of the tiles had fallen off the walls
Workmate: Oh dear, Lynchy's just gone into the bogs with the paper
Me: Dammit! I really need to piss! Guess I'll have to go in the 'ladies'...
Me: Dammit! I really need to piss! Guess I'll have to go in the 'ladies'...