Chicago Winter

1.) The polar opposite of Hell. During the months of Mid-December to Mid-May, it is a cozy -3*F everyday. It's a high of 20 and a low of Antarctica with a chance of rain that'll surely have you sliding in the icy abyss of Lake Michigan. Honestly, this should be a tax deductible for the residents they choice to stay more than five damn hours here. When night time starts at 4 pm and morning ends at 11 pm.

2.) The worst time to be getting lost downtown
3.) The passive death penalty
4.) The reason why no one wants to live in Chicago past October.
5.) The reason tourism halts to an icy stop

When a girl chews up a bunch of ice cubes and blows the cold air onto your balls, causing them to shrivel up if cold enough. Usually an act of malice