Chino Wanker

The Chino Wanker has been a common species amongst the UK youth since around 2010. They are aged between early-to-mid teens and early 20s, and are especially common on University campuses.

Usually, a Chino Wanker...

- Wears Chinos, Vans and vintage tees, as well as Jack Wills, Hollister and Abercrombie
- Thinks any mainstream autotuned music, such as Nicki Minaj, Rihanna and Chris Brown is the be-all, end-all of music
- Frequents the shittest, soulless clubs that play nothing but pop crap
- Describes anything that occurs which is slightly humorous as "banter". It doesn't even need to fit the actual proper definition of banter
- Describes person who does slightly humorous things as "a LAD"
- Thinks they are the epitome of macho, despite dressing like a member of One Direction
- Idolises Joey Essex and Mario "LADotelli"
- Posts really shit anecdotes about how wacky and laddish they are on sites like UniLAD.
- Objectifies the female gender. The only references they'll ever make to women is talking about which "wench" they "smashed" or really shit unfunny jokes about kitchens and sandwiches
- Watches comedy programmes with basic humour like Inbetweeners and Big Bang Theory
- Occasionally some Chino Wankers are edgy and prefer leftfield Indie like The Vaccines and Ed Sheeran.

If you are reading this definition and all these sound like they describe you to a tee, then congratulations! You are a Chino Wanker!

A vile human being who originally was a huge chav maybe a week ago, but then suddenly purchases a pair of chinos and possibly an optional hollister shirt which replaces the traditional adidas tracksuit, and then suddenly presumes they are an "indie kid": they're not mainstream in the slightest, and "totally unique" from everybody else. Although seeing as most chavs are adopting the chino wanker style, it is becoming pretty mainstream.

Chino wankers are commonly more annoying than actual chavs themselves; they are louder, cockier, walk even more like a dickhead, pretend to be drunk as an excuse to act even more like a twat, shout at everyone who isn't also a chino wanker like them, and are just a general threat to rest of the human population.

chino wankers are a individual or a group of LADS aged mid teens to 20 and are obsessed with football , fancy a cheeky nandos , refer to everything that isn't that funny as "banter" or refers to anyone that stimulates their poor humour as a "top LAD" They tend to only drink cider and pretend they're drunk off one can. They make jokes about eachothers mums or make sexist jokes about girls only being good for certain things like the kitchen.

They will wear gazelles , jack wills and holister

Tennage American boy who obsesses over any thing soccer related (may even call it fútbol). This includes FIFA as their video game of choice... A chino wanker will obsess over the game, play all the time, learn all the players and even adopt a British accent.
An American chino wanker can most easily be recognized by the overuse and misuse of the word banter (it will sound like 'banta' because of their newly found British accent).
This type of person probably thinks they're better and acts macho and strong to prove it.
Either a fan of pop music (like Beyoncé) or singer/songwriter (like Ed sheeran)
Most likely will be wearing low or no socks with vans or old nikes
Wears shorter shorts and occasionally chinos, but not as much as a typical chino wanker. This type of chino wanker is primarily found in the states which is why it is specific to Americans.
Lastly, these boys are likely to have tiny dicks, as do regular chino wankers