12 Section Egg Protector
A small yellow plastic briefcase with 12 round bumps in each side, which can be used to carry and protect up to 12 eggs, assuming these eggs are from your average chicken and not a big ol' ostrich or fat pterodactyl. Also doubles as a surprisingly effective head and/or back massaging device. However, it is recommended that no eggs are inside the 12 Section Egg Protector while a massage is taking place, as this can result in a bad case of 'eggy back', or even 'eggy head'.
Joseph: 'Oh no, I lost my 12 Section Egg Protector when I had 16 pints yesterday and wound up on the kitchen floor shouting "fuck the flamin drongo system bollocks I like Mark!"'
Richard: "You dozy bell-end, how am I going to protect my eggs on the way back from the butcher's tomorrow morning now?! Thanks."
Richard: "You dozy bell-end, how am I going to protect my eggs on the way back from the butcher's tomorrow morning now?! Thanks."