Confusimonism
A body of beliefs and related practices created by the prophet Simon in 2012. Characterized as a religion, Confusimonism teaches that it is permissible and desirable to have multiple partners that fill the varying needs of each individual. Typical relationships may include but are not limited to; baby momma/daddy, girlfriend/boyfriend, sex idiot, roommate, chef/housekeeper, personal assistant. While members may choose to marry, monotony (otherwise known as monogamy) over an extended period of time is a frowned upon practice.
In practicing Confusimonism I’ve found true fulfillment and enlightenment.