Crotchkin
A napkin that was once tucked away in your crotch.
I got ketchup all over my new shirt... hurry, hand me that crotchkin!
Crotchkins
The act of non-schalantly scoring an awesome view between the legs of a hot (or any) female wearing a skirt while sitting down, with a napkin in her lap. Note: you may also call "crotchkins" in the absence of a napkin.
While Nick was walking by a young college female at an Italian restaurant, he nudged his buddy and called out "CROTCHKINS" upon seeing the 100% white cotton panties peeking out from between her legs.
Crotchkins disease
When someone frequently spills food in their lap. Common enough that you shouldn't hesitate to ridicule the afflicted.
<after spilling a plate of spaghetti on oneself> That's the third time this week! I'm having a crotchkins disease flare-up.