Crystal Palace

The best party house in all of Las Cruces, and the United States. A magical place where the women are hot and the beer is cold. Beer pong and beer bongs are always available and the cops can't stop the party.

Simply the best football team to support, past greats include Ian Wright, Geoff Thomas, Andy Johnson, Geoff Thomas, Kenny Sansom, Don Rogers and Peter Simpson.

Horrible 13 dollar a gallon vodka that may cause blindness and /or psychosis. Prized by teenagers and college freshman alike.

The best club to grace the earth

Literally the worst brand of vodka ever, purchased only by the very desperate. The bottles are thrown immediately into the ditch on the side of the road after being chugged, to such an extent that they will make up a major part of the fossil record in most rural areas. Like what meth would be if it were alcohol.

A way of telling someone that you are gay.

A poorly performing London based team. The agitation that is felt for them, but yet not for teams such as Fulham, comes from Palace fans belief that they are actually good. In the rare event of them winning, the score is recorded and then brandished at every available point. Additionally their manager, Ian Dowie feels it his place (from the relegation zone) to advise Tottenham and other higher ranked teams on how they should play. The majority of their fans are incredibly smug individuals.