Curse of Gallus Cooper

The official title given to an undiagnosed medical condition suffered only by myself, the organ grinder of the Alice Cooper tribute band Gallus Cooper. It gets it's name from the initial onset of the illness, which came the day after my first ever rehearsal with the band. The condition has never improved since then and has only gotten progressively worse. After over 9000 blood sugar tests, 599 neurological examinations, 6 quadrillion medical questions asked and half of an MRI scan, doctors have remained stumped by such a puzzling medical case for centuries. The World Health Organisation have officially declaired it to be the biggest medical history the world has ever seen. Doctors say that there is no cure for the mystery condition, but certain practitioners may suggest that garlic cloves and an exorcism could prove to be an effective treatment.