dicktitious
(Adjective) An intentionally false or unintentionally distorted interpretation of an event when recounted by an asshole. Often used vindictively or, or selectively target blame after something has gone wrong.
As if the argument with Kevin after the staff meeting wasn't fun enough, his dicktitious account of of it up the chain of command scored me 45 minutes with Cheryl from HR, getting the whole Professional Behavior and Careful Communications lecture.
dicktitious
When a guy’s penis is smaller than he says it is, his statements are dicktitious (like fictitious)
He said it was a solid 8, but he was being totally dicktitious