Aladdin's Cave

To successfully perform an Aladdin's Cave, the man must first find a suitable candidate. A female that has suffered with chronic obstructive pulmonary disease (COPD) for a number of years will suffice.

The man must first wait until the female has fallen deeply into a slumberous sleep. Following this, in one swift and committed manoeuvre, he enters his erect penis in to the anus of the sleeping candidate.

At the exact point of the female waking, the man must throw ground cumin in to the mouth and nose of the female, whilst shouting 'diamond in the rough!', causing the female, with a whooping cough to close her anus tight.

The males penis must escape the anus before it has completely tightened for it to truly count as an Aladdin's Cave.