disasterbating
Imagining that the worst possible things are going to happen regarding the future, over and over, until you totally freak yourself out.
Deena has been disasterbating about her big trip next week to Chicago. Now she's too scared to pack!
disasterbating
The act of masturbating violently, perhaps using objects that inflict pain on ones genitals, in order to achieve sexual pleasure.
1:"i was disasterbating yesterday with a a piece of plywood and i cant get the splinters out of my dick"
2:"i slammed my dick in the desk drawer yesterday when i was disasterbating and it is crooked now"
2:"i slammed my dick in the desk drawer yesterday when i was disasterbating and it is crooked now"
Disasterbate
v. The act of maserbating and someone interrupts the act, just at the point of climax but before the actual ejaculation, so you have no option but to just put your junk back in you pants and cum all over the the inside of your shorts.
Me: My mom walked in just as I was ejaculating. I had NO time to cum on anything so I just shoved everything back in my pants and came all over myself. what a disaster.
Friend: Dude, you disasterbated!! Hilarious!
Friend: Dude, you disasterbated!! Hilarious!
disasterbation
An irrational exhilaration and enjoyment while experiencing the effects of a natural disaster or other destructive scenario.
All these rich white folk driving around the 9th Ward in luxury coaches to go see Brad Pitt pretending to help New Orleans, it's just Yankee disasterbation.
Disasterbate
In the face of pending doom, man shuns only the quickest and most rewarding of activities. Disasterbation describes the carnal quest for the much-coveted preapocalyptic climax.
The second most satisfying of self-pleasuring activities, Disasterbation bows only to Faux Invigordisastpublation--publicly masturbating, with vigor, in anticipation of a miscalculated armageddon.
(see also: Dicksimation, Blastpocalypse, Cum Bucket List, Anal-Eye-alation, Catajysm, Catastrofeces, and Holocaustitution)
The second most satisfying of self-pleasuring activities, Disasterbation bows only to Faux Invigordisastpublation--publicly masturbating, with vigor, in anticipation of a miscalculated armageddon.
(see also: Dicksimation, Blastpocalypse, Cum Bucket List, Anal-Eye-alation, Catajysm, Catastrofeces, and Holocaustitution)
INTELLECTUAL 1: "My goodness, Intellectual 2, I dare say that, despite having immaculately worded definitions, the examples UrbanDictionary endorses often seem contrived in nature, unnecessarily abrupt, and leave one with a dearth of expounding information via general scenario, anecdote, or lexicon."
INTELLECTUAL 2: "Hear Hear, Intellectual 1! I ... OH! Gracious, is that an earthquake!?!? ... DISASTERBATE!"
INTELLECTUAL 2: "Hear Hear, Intellectual 1! I ... OH! Gracious, is that an earthquake!?!? ... DISASTERBATE!"
Disasterbation
To gorge on the massive amounts of fear-mongering news media that reports on nothing more than tragic and violent events across the country and the world.
The disasterbation in this country was waning after the shooting in Arizona until the earthquake/tsunami hit Japan.
Disasterbate
When, after unsuccessfully attempting to pick up at the bar (or elsewhere), one returns home to masturbate... Generally while sobbing.
"I was chatting up this totally hot yoga instructor all night when she decides to mention that she has a boyfriend... So I basically had no choice but to head home alone and disasterbate."