Donkey Dicknutz
The fabled burro of coffee picking legend Juan Valdez, used extensively by Columbian coffee producers for promotional purposes, often resulting in the pack animal's untimely demise. In Menudo-like fashion, a successor ass is always being groomed, in case the need arises to take over the exhaustive workload of supplying coffee to the world on your back.
Juan Valdez at the 2002 NAFTA Summit: "The United Estates should to loving Donkey Dicknutz... America runs on a'heen."