Dr. Facebook
Someone who posts lengthy essays on someone else's miserable status, giving them deep, personal information that all of their facebook friends can see. It's quite cheesy.
Some Kid: Wow, my life is over. I CAN'T believe this is happening to me...how did things get this way?
Dr. Facebook: Now, now, just remember that in the grand scheme of things, the blah blah is never gonna blah blah, so if you just blah blah, and follow your heart, all your blah blah will come true.
Observer: wtf who paged Dr. Facebook?
Dr. Facebook: Now, now, just remember that in the grand scheme of things, the blah blah is never gonna blah blah, so if you just blah blah, and follow your heart, all your blah blah will come true.
Observer: wtf who paged Dr. Facebook?