Ellensburg

A small town in the middle of f*****g nowhere. Has a rodeo/fair, which is the only thing worthwhile to do there unless of course you want to go to college, which 90% of the towns population has never been to because they were too busy working on the farm. The other 10% actually attends the college and spends their free time smashing glass bottles in the bike lane. Has an awesome doughnut shop, a really good ice cream shop, and a semi talented high school. People should go there at least once in their life to get the experience.

Short for Ellensburg, Washington. Has CWU, the bestest university ever. Also has a disproportionately large amount of burger joints and a middle school older than Grandpa Jack.

Hick-town hole in the middle of nowhere.

A tiny little desolate wasteland in the center of Washington with a few buildings spewed across the land. There's absolutely jack-shit to do there, except for smoke pot and go to college (which coincide with each other). Apart from a comic shop and a Taco Bell, there's not a whole lot actually worth going to. Plus the whole damn place smells like cow shit.

Sexual act with the cremated remains of an ex-lover where you spit in the urn, get the ashes in your hand, jerk 2 strokes, jizz in the ashes, and cry out “aaaand there’s your receipt”