enternet

Very slow Internet. Slow Internet becomes Ent-ernet - with reference to the Ents of Middle Earth in the Lord of the Rings Trilogy by JRR Tolkien. When it seems like you've been sitting waiting for ages and your device hasn't even said Good Morning to the server - then you are on the Enternet! See below:
Merry: It's been going for hours.

Pippin: They must have decided something by now.

Treebeard: Decided? No, we have just finished saying "Good Morning".

Merry: But it's night time already! You can't take forever!

Treebeard: Now, don't be hasty, master Merriadoc.

Merry: We're running out of time!