Fanpon
Derived from the combination of "fannie" and "tampon."A devise, usually folded toilet paper, that is used to absorb poop that is left behind after a BM. Most often used as a means to carry out your day without spending endless hours wiping and/or having an irritated O-ring.
Jim was tired of wiping and wiping and finally decided to put in a fanpon so he could get back to the party.