Firm Torpedo

The best possible bowel movement one can have. The turd comes out with minimal effort, and is shaped like a torpedo which reduces the need for straining. It has a firm consistency which means it is not soft and runny, nor is it as hard as a rock. It is the type of bowel movement in which only two wipes are necessary. One to clean off residue (even though there isn't any), and another to double check and subsequently confirm ones amazement at how cleanly the turd came out.