Funky Phantom

Sub-species of wigger, a white kid from a middle-class suburban family who acts like he hails from the Hood. A Funky Phantom is usually too busy recovering from rollin' with his homies (hence the "funky") to bother coming into work, thus causing problems even though he's usually invisible (hence the "phantom"). Is out of work two days a week and takes half-days the other three. Is all "Yo, keepin' it real" and thinks he's the ultimate babe magnet; whenever he talks to a woman his voice drops to a deep whisper and he practically climbs on them in his efforts to seduce them. Claims he likes people who are brutally honest but basically lives one gigantic lie, fo' shizzle.