grad school
Limbo; purgatory; a place where you waste the best years of your life apprenticing for the PhD guild.
THE BAD:
- endless homework
- potentially asshole professors
- little social life
- boring repetitive classes
- dull TA work
- shit pay
- you might end up in the middle of nowhere
- constant moving massacres relationships. Remember the girlfriend who left you because she couldn't take the long-distance relationship? Your friends? The family you see for 2 weeks per year? Better forget them... Easier that way.
- having to teach obscenely hot 18 year olds without being able to touch them
- leads to frigidity and involuntary abstinence
- it's 4am. You went to class between 9 and 12. You ate pretzels for lunch, then you graded for 4 hours. Then you wrote homework. Now your eyes are bleeding and you have the urge to cut.
- once (if) you graduate, you have to move again, in order go to post-doc, which is the same as grad school except you get a few bucks more and you write fewer pages of homework
- incipient alcoholism
THE GOOD:
- incipient alcoholism
- easy ticket to the first world for talented third worlders
- easy ticket to a big city if you luck out
- you can really slack away if you play your cards right
- 3+ months of vacation
- sort of intellectual
- beats the fucking 9 to 5. You're making 40K working 40 hours a week with 2 weeks vacation? In grad school people can make ~20K with ~10 hours of work per week and 3 months vacation. You do the math.
THE BAD:
- endless homework
- potentially asshole professors
- little social life
- boring repetitive classes
- dull TA work
- shit pay
- you might end up in the middle of nowhere
- constant moving massacres relationships. Remember the girlfriend who left you because she couldn't take the long-distance relationship? Your friends? The family you see for 2 weeks per year? Better forget them... Easier that way.
- having to teach obscenely hot 18 year olds without being able to touch them
- leads to frigidity and involuntary abstinence
- it's 4am. You went to class between 9 and 12. You ate pretzels for lunch, then you graded for 4 hours. Then you wrote homework. Now your eyes are bleeding and you have the urge to cut.
- once (if) you graduate, you have to move again, in order go to post-doc, which is the same as grad school except you get a few bucks more and you write fewer pages of homework
- incipient alcoholism
THE GOOD:
- incipient alcoholism
- easy ticket to the first world for talented third worlders
- easy ticket to a big city if you luck out
- you can really slack away if you play your cards right
- 3+ months of vacation
- sort of intellectual
- beats the fucking 9 to 5. You're making 40K working 40 hours a week with 2 weeks vacation? In grad school people can make ~20K with ~10 hours of work per week and 3 months vacation. You do the math.
I decided to go to grad school... Sure, I don't have a girlfriend... Or a car... And my friends from my old city have all but forgotten me... And I write 40 pages of homework per week... And the hot students I teach are driving me insane... And the old professor fucks are raping me at every opportunity... And I'm on a first name basis with the liquor store owner... But goddamn, at least I'm not in the 9 to 5! Yesterday, Wednesday the 12th, I slept until 1pm and then I watched 3 movies, played games for 4 hours, and drank 14 beers. Tomorrow, on Friday, I'll do the same. In a month it'll be summer again and I'll fly home to see my friends and get a nice tan... I used to think about graduation, but that was 2 years ago.
Yeah...
Yeah...
Grad School
Short for Graduate School. A way of putting off entering the real world.
"She went to grad school to delay the inevitable, a real job"
Grad School
Noun.
Short for: Graduate School
A place your social life goes to die and your wallet goes for a long term crash diet.
A place any remaining sanity left after undergraduate school, and any duration of living in the real world post-undergrad, is officially taken away.
Short for: Graduate School
A place your social life goes to die and your wallet goes for a long term crash diet.
A place any remaining sanity left after undergraduate school, and any duration of living in the real world post-undergrad, is officially taken away.
"I owe over $150,000 dollars in student loans from grad school and all I got was this stupid underpaid job."
grad school hot
When mediocre-looking people are perceived to be more attractive than they actually are due to the confines and maladaptive effects of graduate school.
The phenomenon of mediocre-looking people finding themselves fought over by increasingly desperate people.
The phenomenon of mediocre-looking people finding themselves fought over by increasingly desperate people.
Is she hot or just grad school hot?
He's totally hot.
You've been in grad school too long. He's only grad school hot.
He's totally hot.
You've been in grad school too long. He's only grad school hot.