hyphil
A terrible disease like Ligma, Sugma, and Sugondese but instead of being a joke on male testicles it's replaced with the script of the flex tape infomercial. An example would be:
Me: " Honey, im back from the doctor, he said- he said that I have stage 2 hyphil."
WIFE: "W-wait, what? I don't know what to say..."
WIFE: "Well, could you tell me what it means?"
ME: "Are you sure you want to hear this?"
WIFE "...yes, please tell me"
ME: "Ok, here it goes"
ME: "Hi, Phil Swift here with Flex Tape! The super-strong waterproof tape! That can instantly patch, bond, seal, and repair! Flex tape is no ordinary tape; its triple thick adhesive virtually welds itself to the surface, instantly stopping the toughest leaks. Leaky pipes can cause major damage, but Flex Tape grips on tight and bonds instantly! Plus, Flex Tape’s powerful adhesive is so strong, it even works underwater! Now you can repair leaks in pools and spas in water without draining them! Flex Tape is perfect for marine, campers and RVs! Flex Tape is super strong, and once it's on, it holds on tight! And for emergency auto repair, Flex Tape keeps its grip, even in the toughest conditions! Big storms can cause big damage, but Flex Tape comes super wide, so you can easily patch large holes. To show the power of Flex Tape, I sawed this boat in half! And repaired it with only Flex Tape! Not only does Flex Tape’s powerful adhesive hold the boat together, but it creates a super strong water tight seal, so the inside is completly dry! Yee-doggy! Just cut, peel, stick and seal! Imagine everything you can do with the power of Flex Tape!"
WIFE: "I want a divorce"
WIFE: "W-wait, what? I don't know what to say..."
WIFE: "Well, could you tell me what it means?"
ME: "Are you sure you want to hear this?"
WIFE "...yes, please tell me"
ME: "Ok, here it goes"
ME: "Hi, Phil Swift here with Flex Tape! The super-strong waterproof tape! That can instantly patch, bond, seal, and repair! Flex tape is no ordinary tape; its triple thick adhesive virtually welds itself to the surface, instantly stopping the toughest leaks. Leaky pipes can cause major damage, but Flex Tape grips on tight and bonds instantly! Plus, Flex Tape’s powerful adhesive is so strong, it even works underwater! Now you can repair leaks in pools and spas in water without draining them! Flex Tape is perfect for marine, campers and RVs! Flex Tape is super strong, and once it's on, it holds on tight! And for emergency auto repair, Flex Tape keeps its grip, even in the toughest conditions! Big storms can cause big damage, but Flex Tape comes super wide, so you can easily patch large holes. To show the power of Flex Tape, I sawed this boat in half! And repaired it with only Flex Tape! Not only does Flex Tape’s powerful adhesive hold the boat together, but it creates a super strong water tight seal, so the inside is completly dry! Yee-doggy! Just cut, peel, stick and seal! Imagine everything you can do with the power of Flex Tape!"
WIFE: "I want a divorce"
hyphil
A dangerous disease originating in the sugondese region
P1: hey bro, dont go catching hyphil
P2: bruh... im not even gonna answer that cuz its gunna be something like ligma right
P1: Nonono its real
P2: K.. I'll bite - what's hyphil
P1: HI! PHiL SWiFt HErE with ffFFlex tape!
P2: Shut up.
P2: bruh... im not even gonna answer that cuz its gunna be something like ligma right
P1: Nonono its real
P2: K.. I'll bite - what's hyphil
P1: HI! PHiL SWiFt HErE with ffFFlex tape!
P2: Shut up.