Newton's Turd Law
Newton's Turd Law is a physical law described by Isaac Newton, a 16th-century British physicist and mathematician, dedicated to describing the kinetic behavior of a semi-rigid externally unconstrained fecal system of particles forming a semi-rigid body, otherwise known as a Turd. Specifically, this law focuses on the behavior of a Turd post-freefall collision.
This law is part of a set, known colloquially as Newton's Laws, collectively discovered by Newton when observing that his Turds accelerated downwards and not sideways or diagonal.
This law states that 'for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction'.
Newton's Turd Law is the explanation for water splashback when taking a shit, why larger shits have appropriately larger splashbacks, and why gigantic shits could break the toilet.
This law is part of a set, known colloquially as Newton's Laws, collectively discovered by Newton when observing that his Turds accelerated downwards and not sideways or diagonal.
This law states that 'for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction'.
Newton's Turd Law is the explanation for water splashback when taking a shit, why larger shits have appropriately larger splashbacks, and why gigantic shits could break the toilet.
We are looking forward to hosting the prestigious international physics-chemistry conference in which participants will have the opportunity to present experimental data and physical samples involving Newton's Turd Law.
If you poop in my bedroom, I will be forced by the physical law of nature known as Newton's Turd Law to defecate in your bedroom, equally by total quantity in volume, assuming a similar density of substance.
If you poop in my bedroom, I will be forced by the physical law of nature known as Newton's Turd Law to defecate in your bedroom, equally by total quantity in volume, assuming a similar density of substance.
Newton's Turd Law
The turd law exists as a precaution to those who, while holding in their poop, have the urge to sneeze. It states that, in such condition, for every sneeze, there is an equal and disgustingly opposite reaction.
I gotta sneeze.
Didn't you say you had to shit, too?
Yeah, so what...
Dude you can't sneeze or you'll totally shit your pants.
Says whom?
Newton's Turd Law, read a book.
Didn't you say you had to shit, too?
Yeah, so what...
Dude you can't sneeze or you'll totally shit your pants.
Says whom?
Newton's Turd Law, read a book.
Newton's Turd
The Psychological version of his 3rd Law ("for every action… ) of Motion.
Alluded to in Matthew 7:1, "Judge not… "
Unlike Physics, tends to build into a frenzy, akin to one upping & pissing contest, not settle down.
The 'turd' reference is from apeshit, from a the practice of an enraged ape, takes or finds his recent dump and hurling it
Alluded to in Matthew 7:1, "Judge not… "
Unlike Physics, tends to build into a frenzy, akin to one upping & pissing contest, not settle down.
The 'turd' reference is from apeshit, from a the practice of an enraged ape, takes or finds his recent dump and hurling it
Counselors & Priests see plenty of Newton's Turd in action when dealing with marital & relationship problems