nmpd
Abbreviation for: "Not My Problem Dude". Appropriate for when someone is trying to rope you into their problems, in an effort to get you to take them on so they can avoid, ignore, or deny them. May be a response to an attempt to manipulate one's sympathies or feelings of obligation.
Girl #1: You know that married guy I'm seeing? He's always trying to tell me about his problems with his wife, how badly she treats him, etc.
Girl #2: Who has time for that?? You need to tell him "NMPD!!"
Girl #2: Who has time for that?? You need to tell him "NMPD!!"