50 shades of Grey
A book written by some author who clearly hasn't gotten any in a while. In the book, a naïve little bitch named Anastasia Steele, likes to have sex with Christian Grey, who likes to have lots of kinky, hot, dirty sex, and even though she doesn't really like it all that much, she decides to stay with him for a while. They have sex in the tub and in the bedroom and pretty much everywhere, the book is basically about two people having nasty, naughty sex. The sex scenes are boring however, because Ana talks like a little innocent Mary Sue virgin, who acts reluctant instead of moaning like a good girl and an obedient little whore. I don't know, one of my friends showed me some scenes in the book, and they were pretty boring.
Here's a typical sex scene from 50 shades of Grey:
Ana (thinking): He's so hot! I must have him, I wonder what he'll do
Chris: Okay bitch, come here.
Ana: Okay
Chris (whips ana with something).
Ana thinks: This is just the beginning, it'll be over, I should enjoy this but I don't
Chris: Yeah....Now suck my cock
Ana: Okay (thinks) is this the good part, I'm hoping I do a good job, I wouldn't want him to leave me. Yes, I think it's good, he seems pleased, his dick is still hard, so in health class, that means he's excited. I wonder what will happen next
Chris: Good girl, good girl
Ana: (thinks) Yes... once more.
The book would have been more exciting if it had went like this.
Ana (spread eagle): Alright Chris, do whatever you like. (Shakes ass)
Chris: (Takes belt and hits ana with it) How you like that, bitch.
Ana: Yeah, do it again! I love that, hit that ass, hit that pussy!
Chris: Suck my cock bitch!
Ana: Gladly, mmm, yummy cock.
Chris: Moans, good girl, suck harder
Ana: Yeahhhhh.
The book would have been more entertaining to read if the scenes had been written like this. I apologize if I made you get hard.
Ana (thinking): He's so hot! I must have him, I wonder what he'll do
Chris: Okay bitch, come here.
Ana: Okay
Chris (whips ana with something).
Ana thinks: This is just the beginning, it'll be over, I should enjoy this but I don't
Chris: Yeah....Now suck my cock
Ana: Okay (thinks) is this the good part, I'm hoping I do a good job, I wouldn't want him to leave me. Yes, I think it's good, he seems pleased, his dick is still hard, so in health class, that means he's excited. I wonder what will happen next
Chris: Good girl, good girl
Ana: (thinks) Yes... once more.
The book would have been more exciting if it had went like this.
Ana (spread eagle): Alright Chris, do whatever you like. (Shakes ass)
Chris: (Takes belt and hits ana with it) How you like that, bitch.
Ana: Yeah, do it again! I love that, hit that ass, hit that pussy!
Chris: Suck my cock bitch!
Ana: Gladly, mmm, yummy cock.
Chris: Moans, good girl, suck harder
Ana: Yeahhhhh.
The book would have been more entertaining to read if the scenes had been written like this. I apologize if I made you get hard.
50 shades of grey
An erotic book written by E.L James. It is basically a pornographic book for women, as we all know women dont really like pron so reading about it is better fot them.
My friends call it mommy porn because is literally what it is.
A girl called Anastia meets this successful man Christian grey and they have unbelievable sex and more sex and some more sex. There is a lot of bondage and BDSM on it so beware.
If you are a prude then this book is definately not for you, don't even bother opening it.
My guess is that when the writer was writing it she was feeling pretty horny at the time.
My friends call it mommy porn because is literally what it is.
A girl called Anastia meets this successful man Christian grey and they have unbelievable sex and more sex and some more sex. There is a lot of bondage and BDSM on it so beware.
If you are a prude then this book is definately not for you, don't even bother opening it.
My guess is that when the writer was writing it she was feeling pretty horny at the time.
"Hey have you heard about that new book everyone is raving about"
"Which one"
"50 shades of grey"
"Oh, that my mum reads that"
"Holy Shit!, your mom reads mommy porn"
"Which one"
"50 shades of grey"
"Oh, that my mum reads that"
"Holy Shit!, your mom reads mommy porn"
50 Shades of Grey
A socially accepted piece of a former Twilight Fan-Fiction erotic novel that is captivating females of all ages.
Why can't we watch porn in the breakroom? Because the female employees want to be able to read 50 Shades of Grey and not hear moaning...
50 shades of grey
50 shades of grey is a 2011 erotic novel by British author E. L. James. Set largely in Seattle, it is the first instalment in a trilogy that traces the deepening relationship between a college graduate, Anastasia Steele, and a young business magnate, Christian Grey. It is notable for its explicitly erotic scenes featuring elements of sexual practices involving bondage/discipline, dominance/submission, and sadism/masochism (BDSM).
husband- " hey whatcha reading hunny?"
wife- "This new book called 50 shades of grey..."
husband- "what is it about?"
wife- " about a girl who meets a guy and they becomes very intiment together..he likes to spank and tie her up.."
husband- " oh yeah!"
wife- " mhmm..it's very erotic reading.."
husband- " maybe we should try some of it?!"
( they both run upstairs to bed)
.........
wife- "This new book called 50 shades of grey..."
husband- "what is it about?"
wife- " about a girl who meets a guy and they becomes very intiment together..he likes to spank and tie her up.."
husband- " oh yeah!"
wife- " mhmm..it's very erotic reading.."
husband- " maybe we should try some of it?!"
( they both run upstairs to bed)
.........
50 shades of grey
50 shades of grey is the gayest book ever created. And is read by millions across the world about 90% who read this book are just doing it for the laughs but the other 10% are weird cat ladies and horny weirdo guys. This book is about sex and nothing but sex, but it isn't as good as it sounds it is really about a creepy couple who are sex addicts..
mark: Hey bill have you read 50 shades of grey?
Bill: No when I'm horny I watch porn...
Bill: No when I'm horny I watch porn...
50 Shades of Grey
( based on the novel by E.L. James)
a) the multiple facets of one's psychological profile/personality.
b) a more extensive repertoire- than even the Kama Sutra- of all the possible sexual positions,kinks and fetishes known to mankind throughout history and around the world.
a) the multiple facets of one's psychological profile/personality.
b) a more extensive repertoire- than even the Kama Sutra- of all the possible sexual positions,kinks and fetishes known to mankind throughout history and around the world.
even if you don't have all the 50 Shades of Grey , definition b), in your bag, don't worry; be more concerned with the 50 Shades of Grey definition a), when choosing your friends.
50 Shades of Grey
Porn
“BRO, stop reading porn!”
“What? Dude, I’m reading 50 Shades of Grey.”
“Yeah, that what I said. Shut that shit now.”
“What? Dude, I’m reading 50 Shades of Grey.”
“Yeah, that what I said. Shut that shit now.”