Office Syndrome
When you are in a room (office, classroom, etc.) without an attractive person, so you choose someone that you can pretend is attractive just for the sake of having someone to oggle at.
Jade: "Wow, Marla. That guy over there is super hot!"
Marla: "Uh... Dude, I think you have a severe case of Office Syndrome."
Marla: "Uh... Dude, I think you have a severe case of Office Syndrome."
awesome office syndrome
A condition whereas an employee will be so happy about their office that they want to be there more than normal. Some symptoms include: bragging about their desk, chair races, after-hours happy hour at the office, and writing poetry about the immense love for their workspace.
Where is Steve?
He's still at work... has a horrible case of awesome office syndrome. I hope he kicks it so that we can go to the bar on Friday.
He's still at work... has a horrible case of awesome office syndrome. I hope he kicks it so that we can go to the bar on Friday.
Office Girl Syndrome
A symptom exclusive to males in a workplace charged with high levels of testosterone. Essentially whatever few women present in the workplace become objects of fancy regardless of personality, beauty or behaviour.
In extreme cases, the male formulates reasons or excuses in his own mind pointing to 'proof' that said female actually fancies him.
This disorder is especially pertinent in workplaces with over a 70% presence of males.
In extreme cases, the male formulates reasons or excuses in his own mind pointing to 'proof' that said female actually fancies him.
This disorder is especially pertinent in workplaces with over a 70% presence of males.
Male Banker #1: I quite fancy Jenna, you know. Think she was checking me out from across the desk.
Male Banker #2: Mate, she was checking the time on the office clock right next to you. You need to get away from your work more often, you're beginning to develop Office Girl Syndrome.
Male Banker #2: Mate, she was checking the time on the office clock right next to you. You need to get away from your work more often, you're beginning to develop Office Girl Syndrome.
Office Space Syndrome
Suddenly and inexplicably not giving a fuck at work and life in general. Often caused be completing a huge project or being blasted by a superior. A reference to the 1999 Mike Judge comedy 'Office Space', in which case the cause was hypnosis.
Employee 1: "Now that the Milkowski case is over, I have the best case of Office Space Syndrome. Let's grab a Beer."
Employee 2: "It's 9am."
Employee 1: "DGAF Nation!"
Employee 2: "Fuck it, I'm in."
Employee 2: "It's 9am."
Employee 1: "DGAF Nation!"
Employee 2: "Fuck it, I'm in."
Office Space Syndrome
A condition which occurs primarily in white collar corporate environments where deserving, qualified employees are either passed over for promotion or have their employment terminated outright while their comparatively apathetic or indifferent peers achieve financial and/or occupational success.
Peter is frequently tardy or absent from work while Michael and Samir are punctual, reliable workers. Peter is promoted, but Michael and Samir are fired in order to cut costs. Peter has been the beneficiary of Office Space Syndrome while Michael and Samir were the victims of it.
Office Eyes Syndrome
A syndrome which occurs to many contact-lens wearers, as well as some non-contact-lens wearers, when exposed to 8 hours of the office envirnoment per day. The office environment includes, harsh flourescent lighting, glare from computer screens, dry air due to excessive air-conditioning, etc. Sypmtoms include redness, itchy eyes, some tears, smudged eye make-up (women only)
Joe: Hey Mary, are you ok? It looks as though you've been crying...
Mary: No, Joe, it's just a case of Office Eyes Syndrome. The air-conditioning is drying my eyes out!!
Mary: No, Joe, it's just a case of Office Eyes Syndrome. The air-conditioning is drying my eyes out!!
Dentist's Office Fear Syndrome
The fear that always creeps into your mind while sitting in the lobby of the dentist's office, even though you know it's just the dentist and you're being stupid and panicking about nothing. Many people try to calm this syndrome by reading one of the magazines or books in the lobby, but usually this just makes things worse.
(In the Dentist's Office)
Bob: (reaches for lobby magazine and starts reading)
Tracy: Gosh Bob, I've never seen someone look so nervous reading a magazine before! What's wrong?
Bob: Uhhhh it's nothing, really.
Tracy: Bob, don't tell me you still have Dentist's Office Fear Syndrome!! I thought you were over that years ago!!
Bob: Ahhh stop it!! I can't control it!!(Breaks out in hysterical crying)
Bob: (reaches for lobby magazine and starts reading)
Tracy: Gosh Bob, I've never seen someone look so nervous reading a magazine before! What's wrong?
Bob: Uhhhh it's nothing, really.
Tracy: Bob, don't tell me you still have Dentist's Office Fear Syndrome!! I thought you were over that years ago!!
Bob: Ahhh stop it!! I can't control it!!(Breaks out in hysterical crying)