cable guy

someone who is extremley annoying. Always bothering. A Stalker if u will.

a savoir from a futile past of dial up internet.

A movie starring Jim Carry as an annoying, lonely man.

When you're fuckin your girl doggy style and you shove the remote up her ass, punching her in the back making her clamp her butt hole on the remote.. Resulting in the channel changing on the tv. Repeat until desired channel is met. First preformed by Mayo and Mary Mc-All-Star.

Here are some jokes from Larry the Cable Guy

"I was sniffing around at Victoria's Secret the other day. I was like a retard at a chucky cheese. Guess what they have. Underbritches with holes in the crotches. These things sell for 15 bucks. I'm sitting on a dwarful of those worth 250 bucks at home"

"They now have something called eatin' britches. I bought five pairs for my girlfriend and ate a couple on the way to her house. If they made biscuits and gravy flavored, I'd get fat just off that"

"I beleive if I was paid a dollar for every time my dad said he loved me...Well, money isn't important now"

"They say cellphones put microwaves in your body. This guy used one and pooped out a hot pocket"

"If you don't think that's funny, get the hell out of here"

"I have a deaf brother. He also has teret syndrome, so he's all like *makes nasty hand gestures*"

"My girlfriend read a hog hunter magazine and said 'Why don't you trim you're private areas, that'll look sexy.' Oh no, I said. An hour later I have razor bumps and toilet paper squares all over my balls"

"My grandma was in a farting contest..."

"GitRdone"

Jeff Foxworthy's redneck jokes come to life

When someone is supposed to show up at a certain time or certain range of hours, like 8-12AM and the person never shows up, and assumes that if they show up at 4PM that its NOT a problem.