Uncle mike

A man, THE MAN, a hero and an hero, one whose sole presence belittles everyone within 100 yard radius.

Some refer to him as DA MENG as he's so GZ. Women love him, and men love to hate him as they can never outwit or outmatch him.

That one shitty uncle you know, who says that he has served in the US Army/Navy/Marines, and says that he has fought in WW2, Korea, Vietnam, WW1, Iraq, Libya and Afghanistan all at once, says that he has 25 Purple Hearts, 2 Medal of Honors, and all of these crazy amount of medals, and boasts about being a hero, even though he is only 36 years old and had never been a member of the Military for a single millisecond, he is very likely to own a military Jeep, or a Deuce and a Half.

The Caucasian version of an Uncle Tom. He has not loyalty and will sell out his family for promises made by strangers. He has no backbone and fears being alone. He is so lonely he does laundry with other peoples moms on Sundays until they run or die to get away. In his youth he had promise, loving family, everything but his own low self esteem and fear of rejection sank him to the lowest thing a person can be, a traitor against their own family.

Defeats any roast may make world implode when spoken.
Only use when roasts get to strong.