break of dawn

How long Michael Jackson will be givin you sweet love!!

At the crack of dawn or at the break of dawn, it means very early in the morning; when the sun first rises.

something big is happening and it don't stop until you drop (one up from it's on like donkey kong) first used by the laid great mr Kerr)

The fourth and final installment of the hugely popular saga, Twilight. It is best know for lacking a decent, gripping plot that makes sense, and the creation of a mutant-vampire-baby-freak Renesmee.

A 12 step sum up of Breaking Dawn
1. Bella marries Edward in a sickeningly-sweet wedding.

2. They go on honeymoon and consummate their marriage (although re-reading is needed to understand that they actually did do it) using pillows and headboards.

3. Edward beats the shit out of Bella during the unmentioned act and vows not to do it again until she is a vampire (which, in all honestly, is really quiet sensible and realistic), but she then seduces him and they continue the unmentioned.

4. Bella becomes pregnant by mutant vampire sperm attacking her womb. Edward know this will hurt her and wants her to get rid of it (again, sensible), but Bella stupidly falls in love with the baby freak and will not allow it.

5. The pregnancy is dragged on through about 100 pages of boringness interspersed with gross vampire pregnancy-ness.

6. Bella FINALLY gives birth in a terrifying R rated movie way, which involved the baby exploding from her insides (think if the movie Alien), which breaking her bones, basically destroying her. Oh yeah, and Edward gives her a C-section with his teeth. Yum.

7. Jacob the werewolf imprints on the mutant baby. Poor Jacob.

8. Bella becomes a vampire and they all play happy family for about 200 VERY LONG pages.

9. The Volturi find out about the mutant baby Reneesme, uh-oh. Finally some action!

10. Preparations are made for the Volturi's arrival; you begin to feel slightly interested in the book, wondering who will die (hopefully the freak child).

11. The Volturi come, 100 pages of discussion and they leave. No fight, no (real) deaths. The suspense was for nothing. You begin to start the fire to burn the book.

12. They return to playing happy family. Insert book in fire.

Yeah, Breaking Dawn. The only thing it has broken is thousands of dedicated fans' souls. Thanks Meyer.

An insult to literature; the absolute worst book of the Twilight Saga

Summary:
-Bella (18 year old human) and Edward (108 year old vampire) get married.
-Bella and Edward have vampire sex and Bella ends up with bruises and feathers all over her body (Edward bit a pillow)
-Her eggo gets preggo (major plot hole- Edward is a vampire so his sperm is dead) with a demon child that sucks her blood and breaks her ribs, pelvis, and spine from the inside of her uterus.
-Edward gives Bella a C-section with his teeth.
-They name the baby RENESMEE. poor kid. gonna get beat up in the school yard. :/
-Bella becomes a vampire and they have sex a bunch of times.
-Volturi want to kill Renesmee
-For 200 pgs, they fret and worry about how they're all gonna die
-They convince the Volturi Renesmee isn't a threat. That's right, no fight scene or anything.
-They live happily ever after. Even the title of the last chapter is titled "Happily Ever After"

I recommend this book to: airheads, morons, anyone who wants to spoon their eyes out

What is this "Breaking Dawn" you speak of? Fourth Twilight book?
No, the saga ended at Eclipse. There is no such thing as Renesmee, Bella's nasty hormones, or stuffing her face with eggs that Edward made for her on their unrealistic island in the sun, or Jacob becoming just as much of a pedophile as Edward is.
No.
Breaking Dawn never happened. It was just a bad dream people. Wake up now.

The final installment in the twilight saga that crushed the souls of thousands and thousands of crazed teenaged girls with it's horrible and slightly perverted themes.

SPOILERIFIC SUMMARY:

- Bella, the human, and Edward, the vampire, get married.

- Then they have rough sex that leaves her bruised and battered. (Also, he bites a pillow and covers her with feathers.)

- Then she gets totally pregnant with some kind of demon death baby who grows at a superhuman rate, can read thoughts in the womb, drinks blood in utero, and breaks Bella's ribs, pelvis, and spine from the inside.

- Some werewolf stuff happens and Jacob (20 year old werewolf) falls in love with the tiny demon death baby which sparked many confused and slightly disturbed comments and thoughts in readers around the country.

- The baby is delivered via Cesarean section, which is a polite way of saying that other characters rip Bella's stomach open with their teeth. ("Seriously, they cannot make this into a movie. I cannot imagine for one second how they could make this into a movie appropriate for teenage girls and keep this part in it.")

- Bella becomes a vampire and develops superpowers and has sex with Edward a lot of times.

- Everybody lives happily forever after.

The book does however leave one major unanswered question: What's it like doing it with the undead? "Was it like fucking a popsicle?" Alas, we'll never know.

The book was met with an awful response from the fans and motions to return every copy have been put in place.