African Street Monkey
Something that lives in your homes, eats your wifes carpet, and steals your tv, car(s), and whatever else they can manage to get into their oversized pants. These creatures are also referred to as a negro, or black person.
Mother why is that monkey down the street have his pants to his ankles? Mom: because African Street Monkeys use that as a mating ritual to attract other African Street Monkeys, and also to ward off other possible male mates. If you notice this behaviour darling call animal control and look in the other direction.