Poopsick
Incorporates any manner of severe, debilitating intestinal distress, usually with sudden onset. Whether solid or liquid, buttery soft-serve, or granola-style niblets, "Poopsick" refers to the inability to function normally due to the body's need to rapidly jettison ballast at all costs. Results in abandoning any previously decided courses of action.
"Nope, he got poopsick after dinner and didn't feel like making travel plans."